the talking bear

Crazy Tours of Nowa Huta

I spent a Sunday not so long ago by going to Nowa Huta for a tour in a Trabant. Stalinist architecture and east-German cars go really well together... Originally sent to Radio Polonia on 15.09.2006. Read further for original uploaded material and transcript. Also Flickr photoset here.

UPDATE: Since Radio Polonia is now the Polish Radio External Service, I can't find the link to the podcast. You can download my original version (with extra music) here (10.6 MB).

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, my dears, it’s one of Crazy Mike’s souped-up Trabants, and he’s going to be taking us around Nowa Huta. ‘Nowa who?’ I hear you say. Well, far from the crowds of tourists that pack into Kraków’s Old Town, Poland’s southern city also has a little-known secret, on an absolutely massive scale. Nowa Huta, or ‘New Steelworks’ in English, is a district that is located to the east of Kraków, mainly known for its socialist architecture and huge steelworks that polluted southern Poland for decades. Once our party managed to squeeze into the car, away we went, through the smog-filled haze that the Trabbie left in its wake.

On the way to Nowa Huta, our guide Michał Ostrowski, or ‘Crazy Mike’, gives the lowdown on Nowa Huta and where he will be taking us:

The first stop is the communist restaurant, it hasn't changed so much for the past twenty-five years. Now they have redecorated it a little bit, but they kept the '80s vibration, and it's not so smelly as it used to be, but still it's a really funny place. The time has stopped there, the waitresses, the owner, the decor, it's totally the same you know, but there's no competition here in Nowa Huta, not so many restaurants, and clients don't really care... I'll show you a map of the district, and show you some pictures, tell you where we are...

Once at the café of our destination, anecdotes and some history blend to create a local narrative that describes Nowa Huta. First, an introduction and an example of one of the many paradoxes that the Polish strain of communism had to offer:

The name of the restaurant is Stylish, and it's really in some way... stylish. As I told you, the '70s-'80s decor, not so many changes, maybe there is Coca-Cola and advertising. This was the only city without a church in Poland, but people from the south of Poland, they came, they are very religious, they wanted a church, generally twenty years of fights, riots, they put up the famous cross, the government wanted to remove it, you know. Big story with the church, finally in the late '70s a church is opened in Nowa Huta, a symbolic date that God is coming to Nowa Huta. Very interesting, because you build a modern socialist city, and the payments are extremely dirty capitalist, and the paradox, there's a struggle for the church in Nowa Huta, how the Church appears in '70s, everybody comes after work, helps for free, I can paint so I paint, he's a brick-layer, so he is laying bricks for free, and he is an engineer, so he is making some plans for free, because we are building a church, for us, for the community, so this is clean communism yeah, so this is the paradox that the anti-communist symbol of the church is built in a very communist way.

After taking a shot of vodka and tucking in to some szarlotka, or apple pie, the history lesson begins:

This is called New Steelworks, and it's a district of Kraków now, but it was planned after the War to be a separate city, a model socialist city, the example for the future, the most logical plan, the most perfect city, and of course the town was built for the residents and the workers and their families because they built a big steelworks here. After the War we needed a big steelworks, and we needed to produce. There were of twelve possible locations, and finally Kraków is chosen and there are two theories: a very popular theory is the politics (politicians) decided that the steelworks and the workers' city will be located close to Kraków, because Kraków was conservative, anti-communist, religious city, former capital with a lot of churches, in a way dangerous, they worried about anti-communist rebellion, and there are some facts to show that it can be dangerous for the Communists. Kraków was not destroyed in the War, people were really strong here, and now they write here that politics decided to build it here as a revenge of Communists for Kraków, you know, just to counterbalance Kraków, put it in the shadow, to make people forget about Kraków and think only about Nowa Huta. But it's not totally true, there were a lot of economical reasons, poor over-crowded villages in the neighbourhood, so plenty of labour-force that can come. Good place to locate a steelworks, a big river to supply water, quite close coal mines, so you need coal, and iron, we don't have iron, so we take it from the Ukraine. A really good economical decision to locate it here, actually. It was not only the revenge. In ten years, the government builds a city for 100,000 people, I mean these people built it, so there is propaganda, there are songs about Nowa Huta even, people are coming from different parts of Poland, not so much forced to come here, propaganda makes them come, it's like the Wild West, the place where you go, you get an apartment, you get a job, you get everything that you need.

The best Polish architects are planning the city, the cream of the crop, so it's a really good plan, not many collapsing constructions, quite well organised, and Nowa Huta appears, and as you can see it's based on a semicircle, with a main square, one, two, three, four, five avenues radiating from the square, precisely 45 degrees everywhere, four of the avenues are supplied with tramlines, the tram goes to the steelworks, around half of the steelworks, and goes to Kraków, so it's perfect public transportation. The steelworks is amazingly big, because if this is the city of 100,000 people, the steelworks looks a bit like this, six times bigger than the original city, it was the biggest steelworks in the world when they built it, it's around two and three thousand acres, so it's huge, it's like a big city, with a few hundred kilometres of rails, a few hundred kilometres of roads, so it's amazingly big.

They are fighting to get it on the UNESCO list, I don't know when, but it's the biggest example of socialist architecture, I mean the whole complex yeah, with not so much distribution of different types of architecture, so a local group is fighting for this.

A stroll around the huge Plac Centralny, or Central Square, shows how the city should have developed if it were not for lack of money, something that was all too common in the days of the Polish People’s Republic. Having admired the magnificent buildings and the net of wiring that powers the trams coming out of every corner of the square, it’s back to the Trabant and off to the steelworks for an inspection, before checking out an apartment which has retained its ‘80s style and décor.

The apartment has been left relatively unchanged, and gives you an idea of what living n such a place must have been like. Even the smell was, how to put it, stale… Mike explains, amongst other things, the problems of fruit and the troubles of young love in Communist Poland:

You used to wait like two months to get a fridge, this one's Russian, Minsk, so you had to wait for all the things, you don't go to the shop and buy, but you wait, you arrange, you have to really think, but finally you get everything. There were no fruits, no bananas, oranges, pineapples didn't exist, coconuts and mangoes, and all this stuff. Only Polish fruits. Western fruit was special stuff, families from the west were sending us food, I remember fruit packages. My father was in the States and he was sending us bananas, oranges, with the coconut we didn’t know what to do, and the pineapple, it was like really complicated stuff. When I split with one girl, when I was ten eleven years old, so she split with me because I was not responsible, and I gave her an orange as a splitting gift... You couldn't go the shop and by an orange, maybe during Christmas sometimes, you had to have a family approach (connection).

I like this washing machine it's called Francesca, and what's interesting is that the design is from the 50s, but they were producing Francescas until the end of Communist Poland, so until '89, and it also showed the type of development in Communist countries, that you have the design of something from the '50s, but you make it for as long as possible, because there's no demand from the market.

Crazy Mike has been taking rides to Nowa Huta for the past three years. How do you come up with such an idea though? He told me more after the tour:

I was working in the hotel as a receptionist, finishing my degree in law, so I had a contact with tourists, and once they called me from the hotel, 'there's a couple, they need two hours guiding, so I came with my little Polish Fiat, you know, old communist car, I wanted to take them to the castle, I just used the car as transportation to get to the Old Town , but they've already seen the Old Town, so I had to show them something else, so I took them to some off-the-beaten-path places, and they really enjoyed it, they really had a good time, very chilled out.

And do you have any plans for the future of your business, do you want to buy some more Trabants?

Yeah, I'll buy some more Trabants for sure, I'll extend the offer to some more freaky communist stuff like communist disco, you know, real Polish workers meeting. When we have groups we make a kind of little mayhem, Polish workers pour a little vodka, give pickles, and people get drunk and it's a lot of fun, so kitsch band playing and so we go in that direction, so there's less history, and more socialising, between tourists and Polish workers, that speak no English of course...

So it seems that Crazy Mike won’t be trading in his Trabant for a Ferrari just yet, although a tour around Nowa Huta is made that much more enjoyable when in the back of a genuine East-German motor that runs on two-stroke petrol and sounds like a lawnmower. Mike and his team can be checked out on the internet at www.crazyguides.com.

6 Month Update

You wouldn't have thought that after nearly 6 months of absence (ab-sense?) I would have bothered to update my blog. I feel it a kind of duty. I owe it to a lot of people. I may even owe it to myself. I dunno.

The last six months, and in fact this whole year, has taught me so much about what is real and what is not; what is truth (or something that resembles it), and what are porky-pies, or just plain bullshit. I suppose such emotional conflicts are something that every person has, more or less. But let us not dwell on emotion for too long, as there are things to be told.

I am still an MA student. Although at this point in time I rather I weren't. Last semester I attended class, of course, but there wasn't enough of it.

I worked as an intern at Kraków's International Print Triennial. I was supposed to learn something useful, like do a bit of PR or something. I translated instead. Oh, how I translated. Now I know this blog is about my profession also. But this was incredible. I started to figure out that I was not cut out to be a full-time translator. Nevertheless, I finished the internship after three months (the time alloted by the university), and found myself with a few translations coming in, either from the Print Triennial or from the Bunkier Sztuki, the contemporary art museum. And of course some students keeping up appearances from time to time. I trained one in English for his matura exam. My next-door neighbour's grand-son. No pressure there, then. Luckily he passed. And they say A-levels are getting easy in the UK...

I went on holiday to Italy. Beautiful. I went by train from Poland. It took me forever, because the Italians decided to strike on my ass the day I decided to travel. So I spent 14 hours in Villach, a very picturesque Austrian Alpine town on the border with Tarvisio. The way back was adventurous too, as precision Italian timekeeping, this time, made me run across Vienna station half-naked to catch my ongoing connection to Kraków. But that's really by-the-by. It was fun.

When I got back from Italy I got busy answering the phone. And making calls too. The last two months have done their business. And I've done mine. I have got two new jobs which ideally sit together side by side. At least with the timetable that I have been given. I am now a lektor at a local (Cracovian) private Catholic university, the Tischner European University (Wyższa Szkoła Europejska), teaching English as a foreign language (natch) but also a practical module for the Applied Linguistics course at the university. All pretty cool. Then a month after that I had an (job) interview at Radio Polonia, the English section of Polskie Radio's external service. Two days later I was in the studio reading the news lajw to a global audience. I got my microphone, and am now their correspondent in Kraków.

All this, and of course more. My company has finally started up. Funnily enough, it's called The Talking Bear. And I deal in translation, foreign-language teaching, and advertising. Yes, you did just read that... I have my own stamp, and what is more my very own accountant. Well, I would like to see any of you try to understand Polish tax law!

Of course, not everything is OK all of the time. My mother's best friend Zyta died just before I went to Italy. She was in a coma for about a month. So sad when shit like this happens. She was with us on our holidays in Italy last year, and I, too, have known her for my fare share of time. She accompanied me with her husband Marek on the drive down to the Abruzzo, and lay on the back seat telling us funny stories and engaging in awesome discussion, whether it was about caffè coretto or Florentine architecture. RIP, Zyta. You were truly great.

And then comes today. I'm sitting at home with a cold and a temperature. Translations from the aforesaid institutions never seem to cease, and of course I'm a little fed up with it all. And then a message: Carmen nie żyje. Carmen was a stray dog (bitch) that hung around our house in the Abruzzo. Her full given name was Carmencita (by the people who looked after the house), and she was very friendly, always hungry and extremely playful. Mum got her inoculations done, got her an Italian pet passport and while I was driving with Marek and Zyta back to Warsaw, Mum and Carmen went to Rome and attended the Angelus on St. Peter's Square. Carmen even had her own seat on the plane on the flight back. However, we knew that she was ill. It wasn't long before she became weak, not helped by last winter, with no doubt. Always cheeky and cheerful, Carmen was great company for us, and for the other three dogs in Warsaw.

In the Wawel choir too, two people have died so far this year. One bass and a second tenor.

How brittle life is: such is the way we are made, alas.

To finish for now - one thing that I have realised is this: you can't have your cake and eat it. But you can nibble at someone else's. (That's love.)

I don't know when I'll next post. The best way to listen to what I am doing is here. In fact I might even start taking my radio podcasts that I file with Radio Polonia and upload them here. Perhaps with a bit of off-the-air commentary?

Love you all, M

PS No, I haven't finished my MA. But I will. Promise.

A Picture Tells A Thousand Words

Life has taken it's toll recently. However, I thought I should at least make an effort to write something. I wonder how many of my blog posts now introduce themselves with such lame excuses. Answers on a SAE to me...

I have realised that many of my photos on Flickr are translated into Polish (by myself, natch). With this in mind, I have started up a set with some pictures with a bilingual title or have bilingual elements in them (in the notes, for instance). This is to show Brits how to make steak tatare the proper way, and likewise to show Poles what Brits keep in their larders. A photographic method not just to show language differences, but also cultural ones (hehe).

Połland Turs

The length between posts on this weblog is just incredible. I'm sorry for that. In fact, I'm not going to make up any excuses, I'm just lazy.

Oświęcim - Auschwitz

For the first time recently I went to Auschwitz concentration camp, which is not too far away from here. All a bit harrowing. Auschwitz II - Birkenau is done on such a collosal scale that it is hard to comprehend it at all. It was all a bit phasing, but I went to the archives to get information on a member of my family who was killed there in 1944. It was my grand-mother's grand-mother, a Mrs Wanda Łoskoczyńska. There she was, in the registry. Taken from Pruszków camp outside Warsaw in August 1944 (after the Uprising was under way), she was interred in Auschwitz and killed on the 13.12.1944. R.I.P.

It's really Baltic. Not in the Mazury, though...

I went with friends to the Baltic last week-end. Jastrzębia Góra to be precise. It was cold, wet and windy, apart from one day when we all went to Hel. Now that was cool. I also took a few days off to see Gdańsk (for lunch) and the Mazury (Mazurian Lakes). So beautiful. So calm. I'm going back there. Maybe next year...

Kraków - Yesterday

Walking around Kazimierz yesterday I saw James Cromwell (of Hollywood fame) looking rather lost on ul. Miodowa. Then in the evening I was treated to Craid David performing live in Sopot. He came out with classic lines to get the crowd going. (I've since forgotten what he said, however... Should have written it down).

Kraków - Today

Went to the airport to get Molly's ticket only to find that the BA office was closed. Pah. Getting a few drinnks this evening...

Kraków - Later

I will pay my fees for uni soon. Then it's one year of solid MA madness at the Jagiellonian. This is the second time I've enrolled at the Jagiellonian for one reason or another. Hopefully it won't end in disaster as it did last year.

As for translations, I am currently busy with some. Getting the cash in, you know how we do.

Papa.

Cracovian Architecture &c.

May week-end a success. The sun in the Beskid Żywiecki was particularly awesome, resulting in mild sunburn...

Of course, to make up for two lost days students decided to pile it in before the week was up, making me go ever so slightly mad. What one does in the name of a few złoty, I tell you. To really finish me off, I've sung every day since I got back, too. Being in two choirs is good fun, but when you have to sing endlessly it does become somewhat tiring. Practice on Weds with Olim Pueri Cantantes, Thursday Mass on Św. Krzyża (Church of the Holy Cross), Friday practice with the Cathedral and Cecylian Choirs, today a break, but tomorrow... Tomorrow is St. Stanislaus' day (Św. Stanisław), patron saint of Poland. The Mass on the Skałka is going to be televised. My boots are trembling.

Apart from running around like a total madman, I have also set up a photoset in Flickr of interesting buildings and architecture in Kraków. The set doesn't have many pictures now, but I'll soon rectify the situation. There's a lot to see, and some of the most beautiful buildings are hidden in the maze that is the Old Town. You can see for yourself here.

And one last thing. The election in the UK. I voted (by proxy). I wasted more paper for a vote that wasn't going to make a difference anyway. Time for PR in the UK? I should think so...

Anyway, in light of tomorrow, here is are the first two verses of the hymn written in memory of St Stanisław, Bishop of Kraków, who was "hacked to pieces" in 1078 by Bolesław II...

Gaude Mater Polonia
Prole foecunda nobili
Summi Regis magnalia
Laude frequenta vigili

Cuius benigna gratia
Stanislai Pontificis
Passionis insignia
Signis fulgent mirificis

Until the next time...

The Big Freeze

  Heat Regulator 
  Originally uploaded by Michosław.

What does it take to freeze a few pipes? Only five days. I have been away (not that you noticed anyway) and during that time my hot water pipes have frozen up. Not my cold water, but my hot water. Madness.

Anyhow, this is my first post direct from Flickr, so hopefully this will all run smoothly. I would write more, but I'm so furious at the prospect of not being able to have a bath (the time is nigh for one, oh yes...) that I can't possibly write any more. Grumble grumble.

A moment for reflection...

Decided not to go to Prague for breakfast: on the other hand, did lots and lots of photos of the snow in Kraków and am listening to DDT (ДДТ: thanks Dad:) and Fairport Convention. Just the thing for those Central European Blues:
A few pictures taken around midnight:

Take it easy. M.

Going Pro...

I promise I will write something of value soon. Have just gone Pro in Flickr and have been uploading various pics from here and there. You may notice that to the left you will see my latest additions to Flickr. Click on them to have a ganders.

When I have something to write about (most probably more translation antics) I will pin it straight up.

But for now, take a shufti here.